Dear Mama Bear: Always Arguing

Dear Mama Bear,

My SO and I have been together for three years, and we recently moved in together. Ever since we moved in together we’ve been arguing a lot more. Not full on fights, just low level constant bickering. I thought it would get better after a few months, but it just seems to be getting worse. Did we make a mistake moving in together?  Is this normal? How do we move past this?

Sincerely,

Always Arguing

Dear Always Arguing,

To answer your first question, no you didn’t make a mistake moving in together. Papa Bear and I went through much the same thing when we first moved in together, as have countless couples before us. Bickering is a normal part of every relationship. People have different opinions on how life should go, and when you put two or more people in a small enclosed space, disagreements happen. The difference between couples who make it for the long haul and couples who don’t?

Communication and Compromise.

That’s it. Talk to each other. Notice I didn’t say argue with each other. Take some time to let calmer heads prevail, then come back to each other willing to compromise. And this is coming from the absolute QUEEN of stubbornness. I don’t like to admit I’m wrong, or that someone’s competing idea is better than mine. If that sounds familiar, take it from me. Your relationship will eventually suffer catastrophic harm if you can’t admit when you’re wrong. That’s just the reality of being in a romantic relationship with someone who isn’t a robot.

Papa Bear and I have been together for coming up on a decade, and while we’ve managed to iron out most of the kinks, we still argue from time to time. It’s a normal part of every relationship, just be mindful of respecting one another and you’ll be an arguing pro in no time 😉

Sincerely,

Mama Bear

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